General Parenting: How Well Do You Know Your Child?

Living with children means nurturing and teaching them. It means talking and listening to them. Living with children means spending weekends at the park and afternoons at the library.

Regardless of how close you are with your children, there will always be things you don't know about them. Here are some questions you can ask your children to help you learn more about their thoughts and feelings. Answer them yourself and then ask your children—just a few at a time if they are very young—and compare the results. Be sure to listen to what your children say without correcting or criticizing.

This could also be a way for your child to get to know you better. Encourage your child to ask you some questions too! Most importantly, have fun!

Ask about your child's feelings.

• What really makes your child angry?
• What embarrasses him?
• What is your child most afraid of? What are some other fears?
• What accomplishment does your child feel most proud of?
• What has been the biggest disappointment in your child's life?
• How does your child feel about his body?
• How does she feel other people see her?

Ask about your child's favorite things.

• What is your child's favorite food?
• What is your child's favorite TV show?
• What is your child's favorite thing to do on weekends and holidays?
• What gift does your child most cherish?

Ask your child about your family.

• What would your child most like to change about the family?
• Does your child feel he is treated fairly at home?
• What about you would your child most like to change?

Ask your child about school.

• What is your child's favorite subject? Most difficult subject?
• What are some things she likes and dislikes about school?
• What is your child's favorite time to do homework?

Ask your child about important people.

• Who is your child's best friend?
• Who is your child's hero?
• What person outside the family has most influenced your child’s life?

Ask your child to imagine.

• What color would she like her room to be?
• If your child could go anywhere in the world, where would it be?
• If your child could buy anything in the world, what would it be?

If you are struggling with the demands of parenting, the Prevention Information Resource Center and Parent Helpline is available throughout New York State, 24 hours a day, in English and Spanish, at 1-800-342-7472. Someone will listen to your concerns and give you information about programs and services that support parents and children.

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